Doin' Time in Saratoga

Greetings from that part of the state that's officially "up" (I'm guessing). Besides making a killing at the racetrack ($4.50, thank you WallStreet Slugger), and almost getting arrested (more about that later), I am here for a library conference. What I will tell you is that the last time I was here was before the Eddie Bauer/Chico's/Ann Tayloring of America, but there are still 4 or 5 stores left that practice cuteness for a living. So in between workshops, I spent some major bucks. Am staying at an unnamed hotel (ok, The Saratoga) where the housekeeping leaves something to be desired, however, the fact that the conference is right downstairs more than makes up for it. So -- we are driving to the racetrack last night, when we turned into what we thought was the racetrack, except that it looked closed, and there were no lights, and we were driving down a road that said "horses only." A cop drives up and says, "this is private property. you're under arrest." I thought I was going to have a heart attack! Then he got a look at us and I think he realized pretty quickly that some major drug deal was not about to go down (unless the drug in question was metamucil). The other big news is my cell phone decided to stop working for no known reason. And I invented a new word: scary + caregiver = scaregiver (kind of like what happens on Halloween). And whodathunkit? Jolly Rancher actually improved on their very high quality original recipe!
B-R-E-A-T-H-E....